"Once upon a time there was a great ring made by an ugly man with a flaming eyeball!" - Prof. Snugglewort

"A dwarf dresses so loud I could have shot him in the dark." -Haldir

"No, he’s dead. Definitely dead. D-E-D-Dead." -P.S.

"Are we there yet?" -Pippin

"Oh no, we’ve wandered onto another movie set!" -Frodo

"Okay, this is how we get in…if we build a giant wooden badger…" -Sam

"I'm too sexy for the Shire, too sexy for the Shire, so sexy it hurts"-Pippin

"They sort of walked, sire. Slight jog if you will." -Gamling

"For the last time, I did not order a giant trampoline!" -Moria Orc

"For Pete Jackson's sake!" -Boromir

"What happened to all my Elvish Wonder Bread?" -Frodo

"You gotta Boogie Down with your bad side!" -Tom Bombadil

~*~*~

Gollum: All I wanted was the Ring, but he said I couldn’t have it. So I had to beat him to death with his own shoes.

Frodo: But, Smeagol, hobbits don’t wear shoes.

Gollum: Oops